College freshman Haven Wellgrove has a pretty perfect life—until the day she has an intrusive thought about murdering a stranger. In the following weeks, her world crumbles around her as the violent thoughts continue to come. She vows to tell no one and confides only in her journal, hoping everything will go back to normal soon. But when a kind classmate sees her struggling and guides her towards getting help, she finally realizes the truth.
She’s not a monster. She has Harm OCD.
Armed with a diagnosis and newfound confidence that she’s not actually a serial killer, she joins a support group in secret. She builds a strong community with kindred spirits who share her symptoms and sickness, including a familiar face she thought she’d never have to see again. Haven even begins to wonder if she still needs her old life to be happy. But the guilt of keeping her new friends secret is beginning to eat her alive. And when her worst fear is realized and her violent thoughts are exposed to everyone she knows, she’ll have to decide what’s more important: embracing her newfound family and ongoing recovery…or clinging to her previously perfect image, and the life she’s leaving behind.
In this heartfelt novel perfect for fans of Turtles All the Way Down and Words on Bathroom Walls, Caitlin Irish delves into the brutal reality of a highly misunderstood illness, and the power of building a support system that truly understands.